Clarity

I don't know why
You are doing what you are doing
I cannot feel
What you have been feeling once twice
Three times
If only I can get in your head
To help you
To save you
If only I could save myself
I wish I could say choose with logic
Not with emotions
I have not been there
I have no choice
I must stay silent
Just know I love you no matter what
Soon clarity will be yours
And open a path through the thick woods

My sentiments exactly: wept

My sentiments exactly: wept

wept

I wept for you today.  Big ugly loud crying as I couldn't take it in.
I am completely in shock you are blind
When I last saw you you could see but barely
You sat on the flóor, disoriented, crying,
I had to help you find your food your water, your warm bed because you are so frail.  I wept for you, for someone that has been sick for so many years without an answer and now in your old age you are being robbed of your sight.  I am still shaken to my core, physically ill that you cannot be helped despite everyone doing their best to care for you.  I just want to bring you home and spoil you for the rest of your days because without your vision, you are lost and scared.  I wept for you today, a deep ugly ugly cry and pray you will soon be OK.  I love you Amelia. My Bedilia

here

No longer will I listen to the whispers of doubt.  I will hold my head high amidst criticisms, taking in only what can help me improve upon myself  and dismissing the rest.  I will not bat an eye when they say I am not good enough, not pretty enough, especially not smart enough to amount to anything, I will turn that hate speech on its heels and send it on its way without a moment's notice. Why I exist I have no way of knowing but trust since I am still here I have something valuable to offer our world and there is work to be done. I stand strong for my girls and though I falter in making mistakes I am teaching them it is never to late to try again.  I am blessed to be here each moment of my life and do not take these moments for granted. I only hope one day others may learn lessons through my mistakes and my time here on Earth.

single

Waiting in line
I asked if you were single
You introduced yourself as Beans
And sat on the steps lacing up your shoes
We went to Bens Den with my cousin Bobby,
Then back to the party.
Drunken kisses, you had such soft lips, the night was a blur
I couldn't wait to see you again
I became nervous when the initial excitement died down, not realizing it would be replaced by true love, for the first time in my life.  I was not an object. A fling, an afterthought. Used. I was wholeheartedly loved by you and respected for who I am.  Thank you for loving me just the way I am, as I love you

Love. Me

Christ redo

In your presence I feel welcome, appreciated, loved.  I feel comforted by the knowledge you are all knowing, forgiving, protective of my inner being.  No matter what is thrown my way I can handle it because you are with me, in both good times and when I am downtrodden, blessed, or suffering at the lowest of lows.  I know my belief in you doesn't mean I won't suffer through tough times, I know you are beside me through it all, a hand to pull me to my feet, to dust myself off, to start over again.  Forgive me for turning my back on you whenever life gets difficult, for using you only in my needs, for not appreciating the friendship of one that is all good, and loving, despite all my flaws.  I cherish our time together and hope I continue to grow, and flourish, as we walk the rocky road together. hand in hand, side by side.

Duke

I have to be honest.  When I first saw Duke at the feral cat colony I did exactly what I did whenever I first spotted a new cat.  I prayed he was just passing through and would go back to his real home so I didn't have to go through the process of trapping, neutering and returning him, and I liked my group just the size it was.  He never did end up going home, not sure if he was dumped there or not. But he made his presence known.  He was a fat orange and white cat, that terrified the little black kitties and tuxedos whenever he had the opportunity.  I ended up having to feed them separately or he would attack them whenever he had the chance. I hoped neutering him would calm him down but he was just the same, when I released him.  Despite his temperament with the other kitties, he did sort of like people, at least somewhat, till he would scratch you out of the blue for no reason at all.  I had a strange feeling he wasn't feral at all, and felt a profound sense of sadness that he was lost between two worlds, too unpredictable to be a housecat, and way too territorial to exist peacefully in any colony.  He was a loner, I could relate.  About a month ago I brought Duke home with the intent of having him live in my garage, so he was safe but didn't continue to attack the neighborhood cats.  He's been in a large crate for labrador sized dogs about a month, too nervous to come out, yet loved to be pet.  Gone was his careless scratching, and while I don't know how he is with other pets, I've noticed he really enjoys being pet and human company.  He's afraid to be loose in the house as he is still unfamiliar with the indoor environment but today he moved himself into our downstairs bathroom, where I have the opportunity to be closer to him.  I don't know what his future holds as he is FIV positive, not a death sentence by any means but if he continues to be aggressive towards other cats he'd have to live alone, but I am so glad I took the risk and brought this fellow home.  I feel I am teaching him he is worthy of love and deserves a good life, a life he probably would never have the chance to experience if someone didn't take a chance on him.

child

Precious child
 worth more than the worlds weight in gold
Please turn towards me and let me see your radiant face
Precious child
Whose destiny is not yet known
Please let me hear you voice
Your cries would sound like sweet music to my ears.
Precious child
Who is so very loved beyond compare
Please let me hold you, your sweet smelling hair intoxicating, somehow making the world just a bit of a better place to be.
Precious child, hold on please, for we anxiously await your future, you are meant to be.

Forest

He placed his tiny hand in mine, my long fingers dwarfing his.  We slowly wandered down the dusty road, stopping to watch a squirrel scurrying to gather enough nourishment for the upcoming storm.  He was probably too busy playing and enjoying our unseasonably warm winter to plan ahead.  We stopped at road's end and walked quietly into the forest.  We looked for pinecones to bring back and fortify with peanut butter and bird seed to hang outside for our feathered friends. The predictions were harsh, but we did what we could to secure ourselves, and our beloved outdoor friends, who would have to weather it out under the most primitive of conditions.

You

For you

I would do most anything

Give up my dreams to follow yours

Give up my hope and let you lead the way

I am nothing without you, my heart is empty, longing, to be near you again.  We are one in the same in our most purest of essence.  We are all knowing, we exude love.