Gone

She was a small girl, slight in stature but had been surviving on the streets for many years.  She was fearful of strangers and had every right to be.  Old untreated injuries left their mark, I fear she saw unkindness on more than one occasion. We recently became friends. She came to greet me each day.  I always bought her something to eat and instead of waiting till I left to eat, she'd hang with me,  I would sit with her, swatting mosquitos, protective of her.  I loved her eyes, their depth drew me in. What in the world had she seen with those beautiful eyes.
    I noticed she seemed under the weather and had some sort of new wound or injury.  I treated her with some antibiotics as she was so fearful, so afraid, I couldn't manage to get her to let me help her out further.  At first it was working.  I couldn't wait to see her each morning.  This past Friday I worked on trying to get her further medical assistance, but fell and injured my shoulder.  It's okay. I told myself.  I can help her on Monday.  Saturday morning I went to visit and she didn't come to meet me.  I missed my chance to save her.  I found her, breathing funny, not letting me near her.  On Sunday I went back and almost had her, but she ran off.  Yesterday I went to check for her and she was gone, my heart tells me gone for good.  I don't want to believe it.  I want to go back tomorrow and see her brightness, the joy in her eyes when she sees me coming.  I want a do over, to be able to help her successfully, and wonder why my wholehearted attempts have failed me, and her. I love her and hope only she is at peace, wherever she may be.